How to Win Friends and Influence People – Dale Carnegie

Review (Amazon): For more than sixty years the rock-solid, time-tested advice in this book has carried thousands of now famous people up the ladder of success in their business and personal lives.

Now this previously revised and updated bestseller is available in trade paperback for the first time to help you achieve your maximum potential throughout the next century! Learn:

* Three fundamental techniques in handling people

* The six ways to make people like you

* The twelve ways to win people to you way of thinking

* The nine ways to change people without arousing resentment

My Review (Spoilers!):

Executive Summary: useful

One of my work development goals for 2016 was to read this book. Every other week, my manager and I discussed the couple chapters that we had read. So it took me a year to read but it was definitely worth reading.

The book is divided into four parts:

Part One – Fundamental Techniques in Handling People

Part Two – Six Ways to Make People Like You

Part Three – How to Win People to Your Way of Thinking

Part Four – Be a Leader: How to Change People Without Giving Offense or Arousing Resentment

It’s a short book and the chapters are short with typically a few real world (albeit sometimes 1930s real world) examples. I don’t think there was anything earth shattering in the book, but it’s often the simplest of things that make the most difference, for instance the book begins giving an example about how Al Capone thought he was a public benefactor, using the example to show that everyone regards themselves well and criticizing them (showing them they aren’t as great as they think) isn’t going to make an iota of difference to them. It’s just going to piss them off. And really this is the underlying principle. Remember people’s names. Listen to their conversation (people love to talk about themselves). Give praise. All pretty obvious and straightforward things, but still things that people need to work on. (I’m rotten with names, and I always mean to make an effort at them but I always forget right in the moment that I’m supposed to be making a better effort.)

I would say that the book is one that you should read multiple times but not just read. Really work to test out some of the techniques in your daily interactions. (My boss used a lot of the techniques on his toddler with quite good results according to him.) The book could perhaps more aptly and modernly be named “How to get shit done while still being nice.”

Verdict: 4 stars

There’s a reason this book is still in print nearly a hundred years later. It’s easy to read, simple to comprehend and is full of valuable techniques. I wouldn’t say that it changed my life but it definitely makes me more mindful of my communication to others.

 

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